Contrary to published reports, Michael Jackson will not perform at this weekend’s Grammy Awards. NARAS probably wouldn’t meet his ridiculous demands. Someone needs to remind Michael that he is no longer an A-lister capable of snapping his fingers and making organizers jump through hoops to accommodate him.

In other Michael Jackson news, he finally paid the property taxes on his Neverland Ranch to the tune of $600,000. But Jackson could still lose the home because he missed the deadline to pay off the $23 million in loans he took out on the mansion.