Music mogul Russell Simmons is today’s Morning Wood by request. Don’t let the smooth taste fool you. At age 51, Mr. Simmons still has what it takes to drive the ladies crazy!
A few of my older readers requested some middle aged wood to get them through the morning. So I am more than happy to oblige!
Please don’t click the link if you’re extra sensitive or easily offended.

Photos: Splash News Online
This entry was posted on Monday, October 6th, 2008 at 9:15 am and filed under Celeb Candids, Morning Wood . You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed or Trackback from your own site. This site is Gravatar enabled. Sign up to upload your own avatar.
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Sandra is trying to get someone fired today. I had to hold my hand over my mouth to hold in the laughter. Whoes morning wood is he, himself or a gold digger?
ctfu…. Bless his Buhddist soul :-))
good morning fam.
i am gonna IMMEDIATELY put somebody in timeout and make them listen to monica and xscape ALL day long as SOON as i find out WHO requested this….and WHY you did it.
Who the fluck requested this f*ckery … Hail … and whats that with him .. an alien ?
morn Kwallace !!! . thats some bull**** right there … I’m tellin you … Give the men Star Jones as Morning Glory since we are being punished …
and who is the anorexic white guy?
Ain’t no damn body requested this…STOP PLAYIN!!
I have nothing bad to say about Russell…I love him!
hey keeeum! like you say your grandma from nc says it. probably how my raleigh, nc azz say it too but don’t realize. how was your birthday? sounded like you kept it low key….
yes give the men-ses some flabby wrinkling boobs, extra skin having, starlet jones~! again since auntie wanna be funny and all.
O.k. ladies which one of you playing jokes today????????????Come on now!! Russell Simmons?????????????????Morning wood????????????????????????????????
Yes - this is a mess……….
Kym you said is that an alien with him…..DEAD!
Just Wrong!!!!
He kinda reminds me of Dhalsim of street fighter “Yoga Fire!”
Who requested this f*uckery? They need a azz whoppin…
kym** Im dead at the Star Jones morning glory!!
OMG!! I had to cover my mouth when I saw that last pic! I’d busted out laughing!! Now, Sandra, if your middle aged readers suggested some “seasoned” morning wood why did you choose Russell!!
This is comedy at its best. You should write for Tyler Perry Auntie.
You would think someone so dedicated to fitness would lift an occasional weight. That man needs some strength training in the worst way. Yuck!
I almost spit out my water laughing. However I do have a question with all that yoga why does Russell have a beer belly?
@ shunda … yoga AND he’s a vegetarian … go figga
I couldn’t be a vegetarian unless medically necessary .. after all the largest land animals ALL are vegetarians .. Elephants .. Giraffes … Buffalo .. Cows .. Rhino’s .. Hippo’s …
hmmmm .. gimme some chicken and fish … I can live without red meat tho … lol
@Kymystry
I only eat chicken and fish. My doctor is convinced that is why I am severly anemic. Russell must like cakes, and pies, and cookies that belly came from something lol
HMMM … I’m anemic as well … intresting …
LMAO! They must be giving out Viagra at Starbucks. Thanks Auntie, got my day started with a good laugh! I spit coffee all over my screen.
i think russ is a vegan which is a tad diff. from vegatarian. no animal products or meat period. and all the vegans i know are thin with a belly too. i am sure a vegan is amongst us on this blog and will be quick to call me out….but if they could, enlighten me.
i have been anemic my entire life. my daddy used to tell me that i need to “grow me some blood!” lol. but i have never been a big fan of meat. i mean i eat it (if i didn’t i woulda starved growing up). but if there is a chance for me to skip it i do (ie if i go to a banquet and there is an extra veg. meal i eat it).
This is just wrong, on so many levels. Every fiber of my being hurts!
Sandra I can’t stop laughing
you a fool for this one Sandra!!!!
That is not cool Sandra;)
we asked for “middle-aged” wood not “petrified” wood LOL girl stop who is that sandy alien with him in the last picture kimora THANK GOODNESS you got something out of sleeping with that fossil
A vegetarian buddy of mine told me she gained weight at first because of all her carb intake.
I do not feel satiated on any level, if I can’t have meat! Pun intended…
Some straight up shyt right here….unacceptable!
GM to Everyone’z and to Everyone’z a GM!
Lord have mercy! That’s all I’m saying.
Moaning MsSuave … just plain flucker at it’s finest !
*sidenote* … listening to Wayne Brady’s CD .. it’s Nice grown folk music … really really nice…
Hey missy! You was a no-show on Friday…that was some fluckery! lol
What type of genre is Wayne Brady’s CD, it is r&b? I always wondered what type of music he’s into. I know he has a nice voice.
He’s R&B he’s got a brian mcknight vibe to him ..
chile it was my b-day .. I was in the streets
… lol …
lol…I’m sure whatever you was doing, you maintained to stay busy…cuz not once did you check-in…you know how addicting this site is, even if we are OFF from work. lol.
Hey, I might have to check it out. Did you hear anything about Robin Thicke’s new joint?
You had all kinds of bday wishes up in here on Friday. I was like “aww, Kymy must be having a good ol’ time…lucky heffa”
One word…YUCK!
Sandra is smoking, nobody requested this mess.
Thanks Sandra
I don’t wanna eat lunch no more…
I just threw up in my mouth a lil bit thanks.
MsSuave (and the rest) .. don’t forget keep Goat’s mom Lifted up in prayer today .. she’s going for the mammogram to see if they have to do a biopsy …
ROTFLMAO SANDRA!
What in the hell??!?!
He obviously made Morning Wood for them dollars he clocking…LMAO
I dayum near choked on my iced coffee. Ok, Russ aint so bad if that’s what you like, but uhhhhhhh Denzel is middle aged too, can we get him?
Thank you Sandram I LOVE Russel Simons with that yoga body.. yummy
I just woke my roommate up over this. This is too much.