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The disappearance of 4-year-old Maleah Davis of Houston, Texas, has created a movement to encourage mothers to stop leaving their children alone with their boyfriends.

Police say Derion Vence was the last person to see Maleah alive. Vence was engaged to Maleah's mother, Brittany Bowens. He told police three Hispanic males carjacked him, knocked him out and took Maleah on May 3.

Maleah was last seen alive on April 30 on a neighbor's security camera, following Vence into the family's apartment. Bowens was inside the apartment at the time, but she told police she did not know her daughter was in the apartment.

"He must have snuck her in," Bowens told a friend via text message.

Vence, 26, was arrested and charged with tampering with a human corpse after Maleah's blood and human tissue were found in various places throughout the apartment.

Six Brown Chicks wrote a post detailing why women should never leave their children unattended with males who are not their biological fathers.

They quote child experts who say men are not nurturers or caretakers by nature. They don't have the proper temperament or the patience to deal with small children who are not their own.

"YOUR BOYFRIEND IS NOT YOUR BABYSITTER. Watch your own child, beloved," they wrote.

The following are 5 reasons why you should not leave your children with your boyfriends.

1. The man he is with you may not be the man he is with your child.

"Anecdotally, providers and people in the child welfare system are certainly aware of the increased risk of mothers' boyfriends [to children], especially those who come late on the scene," clinical psychologist Jennifer Shaw, who works as a partner of the Gil Institute for Trauma and Recovery, tells Vice. "Boyfriends are not necessarily involved in the infancy phase, where a lot of the attachment and bonding with the child takes place."

2. Some men envy the attention that you give your child and may secretly compete with him.

Notes Dr. Kurt Smith, Clinical Director of Guy Stuff Counseling & Coaching, “Men in particular are susceptible to feelings of jealousy, especially during the infant and toddler years. Your man, who may have been the picture of a doting father-to-be, now finds himself an outsider and onlooker to a very unique bond. A bond with which he feels he cannot participate or compete.”

3. Some men resent the child because that kid looks like your ex.

Self explanatory.

4. Some men want to relax at home and a screaming, non-potty-trained toddler is enough to make him snap.

Self explanatory.

5. Some men don’t love themselves enough to love their own child—let alone yours.

Self explanatory.

  • jazmine

    This is all so disturbing

  • Mrs. King

    I haven’t heard one story about the 1 year old baby here in Richmond that was raped and beaten to death.

  • Hazel

    #6 Some men are only with you BECAUSE OF your child. and can't wait for you to be stupid, cheap, or lazy enough to give them unrestricted access...

  • Strappyheels

    Say what??

  • ?Starring Ladii Jaye?

    Say that!

  • Renee26

    The same things can be said about girlfriends the exact same things crazy people come in both male and female bodies... And I still think the mother has something to do with this child's death

  • ?Starring Ladii Jaye?

    I use to be on dating sites and just for kicks I would look at the women profiles...the first thing I see is "I'm a single mother". I couldn't understand why these women thought it was cool to expose that to strangers on a dating site. Or "Me & my child are a package deal"..first of all..where is this child's father? I looked at those profiles as bait for a predator or someone looking to do a child harm because those type of people are out there. We have to be discerning about who we introduce our children to.

  • Hazel

    For sure...there's a woman facing the death penalty right now for starving her young stepchild to death. It was said that she was a good mother to her natural kids....Cleary a crime rooted in jealousy, even though the father was also involved.

  • NSYDEOUT

    What? Are u serious? Fcuk going on around here? Man, if the law don't start stepping up like they call themselves doing for the AB bill, then.......I need martial law to start happening with these low lifers because someone one need to set it off and make an example out of them. Holding my kids even TIGHTER! WIsh a n@#$$@ mf'n would. Destroy the universe for my 2 kids.

  • Renee

    Daddy’s, mother’s, pastors, doctors, etc...

  • MJ

    Exactly. Scroll through Tinder some time and see how many women will freely put up pictures of their kids. I guess they figure they're being honest and upfront, but predators are always lurking.

  • Alextra Ballard

    PREACH!!!!!!!

  • Renee

    I remember in ’89, one of my friends sat me down and taught me about that was becoming a trend for males in Atlanta.

  • Hazel

    It's an evil that knows no familial, socioeconomic, racial, or professional boundary.

  • http://sandrarose.com SandraRose

    What makes men prone to violence is testosterone. Women don't have high levels of testosterone in our bodies. When was the last time you saw a woman punch a hole in a wall or a door?

  • Kimberly King

    You honestly can't trust yours kids with nobody these days. My mom didn't let us go NOWHEREEEEEEEE. And if she needed a babysitter we were either at my grandma's or great grandma's house. She didn't trust anyone and we never could spend a night at friend's house. Now that I'm 30, I totally understand her reason. People are crazy and I know my mom would have been in jail had anyone abused us. Not only should this be a message to not leave your kids around your lil boyfriends, but we also need to spread awareness of not having kids out of wedlock. We have the highest rates of single mothers and a lot of black women think it's cute or acceptable. It's not.

  • ?Starring Ladii Jaye?

    Right! Some people are sick...not just the internet dating..even meeting people the traditional way. I don't have children, but when I do..I know it's my job to protect them at all cost.

  • MJ

    Far less likely with women though. Men are disproportionately the abusers in relationships. Seems like an unfair burden to single women, but it's a harsh reality.

  • Hazel

    Is it testoterone or misguided social stereotypes that make a man too prideful, and unable to verbally express themselves without being considered weak... maybe both.

  • ?Starring Ladii Jaye?

    Facts!

  • blue skies

    the mom need to b arrested as well!

  • Navybeans95

    I had my son when I was 17 and I knew then not to have him around the men I was seeing since his dad was not in the picture...If I had a hookup my son was not at home..if my parents couldn't keep him I didn't go anywhere....

  • Yup, I said it

    Stepmother can be just as bad. They just sneaky about it like over punishing, ostrazocing, picking on or putting the kid down or poison in their food.

  • Ruth

    This man deserves to die.

  • Yup, I said it

    The toddler in the hotel? Jesus, I haven't seen any updates about it.

  • hi-liter

    6. For Working Single Mothers: If the bum ass nigga gotta watch yo kids while YOU WORK then you don’t need him. I’m not leaving no niggas in my house while I GO TO WORK and his ass at home being a house-wife nigga.......no Ma’am......

  • hottlanta

    My friend husband found out when his mom passed that his mom was his sister. They had the same dad. His granddad was his dad. She had him at 13 years old The whole family knew about it. One doesnt have 2 leave the house for something 2 happen 2 u. A lot of stuff happen behind closed doors by immediate family members. Marriage gives u a false sensé of security

  • http://sandrarose.com SandraRose

    It's testosterone that causes aggression, anger and rage in men. Men are more prone to violent outbursts because they have been socialized to suppress their anger.

  • xenaD

    All facts! Bum ass.

  • http://sandrarose.com SandraRose

    Men are responsible for 90% of rapes and violent acts against women and children. Imagine how many people would be alive today if not for men.

  • xenaD

    And this whole post.. is the bottom line!

  • hottlanta

    Yet married folks thinking this doesnt apply 2 them even when that man murdered his pregnant wife n 2 kids. None of us r safe.

  • Renee26

    House-wife nigga... I died!!

  • chan chan

    I can understand having to explain this to a teenage mom but ummmm a grown woman with kids should know this.

  • anonymouse

    Tell your part time/weekend pappys this as well.Your new or latest girlfriends should NOT be left with your kids like that and to those who are married, it's not your wife's responsibility to spend time with your kid while you do you.They just have the kid for the weekend and will pawn them off to whichever female is nearest. I've seen this happen.

  • xenaD

    I’m sick of men

  • ?Starring Ladii Jaye?

    Exactly..but a lot of women think that's the proper setup..in home babysitter..Screw that I'll pay the $300 a week for daycare if I had to.

  • Renee26

    Was his momma named Carlotta?? Jk ?

  • chan chan

    ? say this again for the MF’s in the back. Reiterate u can’t leave your kids with no one!!!

  • Yup, I said it

    Its not exclusive to single people. The thing about marriage is that hopefully you and your partner have been selective. We all know some folks are just as messy and irresponsible married as single.

  • Shaun M

    Some of the guys are pretending to care for the mom, also. If he is pretending to care about you, how can a strange man love a child that’s not his. I don’t trust them at all. Learn to be alone and not accept any old dude around your kids.

  • luVn_liFe…

    this same thing happened her in south florida a few months backs..

    MIAMI - A Miami Gardens man was arrested Sunday after his girlfriend's 4-year-old son was found with burns to his body so severe that his skin was peeling off, police said. Khalil Jabali, 23, faces a charge of aggravated child abuse causing great bodily harm.

    According to a police report, Jabali was watching his girlfriend's three children while she was at work when the boy was burned by hot water that had been boiled in the microwave.
    Jabali called his girlfriend to tell her that the boy had wet his bed and was burned by hot water that he left in the bathroom when her younger child started crying

  • Vegas1989

    And your light, water and gas bill is high because he sitting at the house.....LOL....

  • luVn_liFe…

    nope.. NOT even they pappy!

  • hi-liter

    There are programs for single mothers who can’t afford daycare in damn near every state, esp if they work in the day time.

    It’s just hard to trust anyone these days. A 6 month old baby girl in my city was murdered by a 14 yo girl who was baby sitting her over night while the baby mama worked. The teen hit the baby in the head and she died from blunt force trauma because she wouldn’t stop crying.

  • T865!

    #5 ??

  • luVn_liFe…

    there's not much programs that help single parents these days. women/girls have to take BC until they are truly prepared to care for their baby or be prepared to deal with this malarkey!

  • Renee26

    They very well may be but I told no lies... People need to watch out for allll people. I've seen instances of women being abusive to kids many times...out of anger, jealousy, spite and revenge. Also, many sex crimes committed by women go unreported.

  • hi-liter

    If they have jobs, there are some programs to help with daycare, at least in my state. They have to pay a little bit...like $40 a week instead of $300 for daycare.

  • Meme

    Oh my goodness so tragic, again her mother left her with some random dude when will these women ever learn

  • Vegas1989

    This made my day...I just came out of a staff meeting and I heard some dumb stuff.....I told my stupidvisor I'm not talking to nobody sensitive @$$ no more.....LOL....Peeps are too sensitive. We got warned to be careful what we say....SMH...It's my business if I come to work and share with you that I uber, lyfted and suck 4 Richards over the weekend and Sally Sue heard it and got offending to what I was sharing to you and go and tell my boss....NOPE I DON"T HAVE TIME FOR THIS REINDEER GAMES......LOL...SMH...

  • leapyearpisces

    We "bitter" Roses been trying to tell these wayward hoes this for yearrrrrrzzzzzz, but we were bitter, fat, ugly, and lonely, but aint no "man" of ours ever murdered one of our kids.....

  • T3
  • Chicagowise

    It takes a very special man to take-in an unrelated child and raise it like his own. For some men, children from a previous relationship are a threat and a daily reminder of the other men you've been with.

    Sadly, as horrifying as Derion Vence's actions are, what he did is a natural occurrence that frequently occurs among bears, felines, canids, and primates.

    Male lions kill the cubs when they take over the pride. Male primates have been known to sexually assault and kill young primates. About a year ago, I watched a video where a primate stalked a group of mothers, snatched a baby, and killed it for seemingly no reason.

  • Renee26

    What was??

  • CardiB’sAbs

    BRAVO! I don’t understand how folks that don’t have kids want anything to do with those that do. I don’t want to have any kids of my own. I damn sure won’t date a man with kids and sure as hell won’t babysit anyone elses. I won’t even babysit my little cousins-my own flesh and blood. I like peace, quiet and ME time.

  • luVn_liFe…

    not here in Florida.. my coworker has to fib/alter her stubs to get help w/childcare and kid care.

  • CardiB’sAbs

    YUP!

  • Renee26

    Chile my stepmomma took me to her beautician/friend and had her chop off all my hair when I was 13... Outta spite. That helfa cut me down to the new growth

  • Chicagowise

    ????

  • luVn_liFe…

    say that.. i have a 24 yr old son BUT Would NEVER get serious w/men who had kids!

  • Renee26

    I wanna know but then again I don't... So sad

  • Cali

    The problem, is that a mother has to CARE for her child. This woman, like many others, KNEW what was happening to her daughter and decided Mehhh like so many others. The “boyfriend” is irrelevant, it could be the father, stepfather, brother, sister, aunt, uncle, friend...the root is the disgusting mother. Fix that.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    Sandra, You should’ve written this post in ALL CAPS for the Hoodrats in the Back https://media3.giphy.com/media/J5jmQF8IwNS6Y/giphy.gif

  • CardiB’sAbs

    Right! It’s just too much.

  • CardiB’sAbs

    ????

  • Chicagowise

    When people think of nature, they usually think if sunshine, rainbows, and flowers, but nature has a dark side that can't be ignored.

  • Guest©

    Thank you Sandra!! These type of write-up set you apart from just your average urban blogger. Kudos.

  • luVn_liFe…

    lol.. men used to be like ... "HUH?" but you have a child Im cool with it.. OKAY Im NOT cool with you having any.. and that would be your prerogative if you felt you wouldnt date me because I had one.. I GET IT

  • Mr.LeBrickJames

    "It takes a very special man to take-in an unrelated child and raise it like his own. For some men, children from a previous relationship are a threat and a daily reminder of the other men you've been with."
    -------------
    Yup. That's why brothas like Russell Wilson are the exception, not the norm. There's lots of sisters out there looking for their own Russell Wilson, but those dudes are few and far between.

  • Chicagowise

    LMAO! ?

  • CardiB’sAbs

    I agree 100%

  • Renee26

    I can't stand an ol nosey sensitive mf who tries to mess with ya coins.... I got one at the office myself. Helfa walked up on me today while I was listening (and glancing) to Hot Topics on my phone today. Bet money that helfa goes and tells the boss too.

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    loooooooooooooool

  • Renee26

    The wait lists be long as hail tho

  • Chicagowise

    They are indeed a rare find!

  • hi-liter

    Well yeah. It’s not like they ain’t helping people, you just got to qualify, based on income. Some prolly don’t qualify because they don’t fall bellow a certain income....hence why some people lie like your co-worker.

  • hi-liter

    You know it.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    Chile.... Say it LOUDER!!!!

    There needs to be a diagnosis AND medication for Desperate chick syndrome! https://media1.giphy.com/media/PhFXIlPu4ieKoAQV4V/giphy-downsized-medium.gif

  • CardiB’sAbs

    ??????

  • Guest©

    Very true BUT humans do NOT have to act on instinct. I have more respect for a rabid dog than I do this man.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    Chile...

  • hi-liter

    Aye..when I leave to go to work, EVERY DAMN BODY gotta go, I don’t give a rats ass if you don’t have a job, take ya ass to the Library or some, ion care

  • luVn_liFe…

    dont get it twisted.. I dont condone her nonsense.. she wont even put her sorry as ex on CS.

  • CardiB’sAbs

    Beta males.

  • luVn_liFe…

    yes goodness.. I do not like nothing in my house between 9-5 pm but my pupps! and sometimes I dont want them here!!

  • hi-liter

    Well Ian made at her, she prolly need the help.

  • Lisa Left Eye

    Here's a better list idea for you

    5 reasons men need to confront their rage
    5 reasons not to hit a child
    5 reasons men need mental health checks
    5 ways men can be better caretakers

    Am i missing something here?! If the mother didn't leave the baby with this monster, the child would still be alive. i concede that. Additionally, however, if Darion wasn't a child murdering piece of trash, the child would still be alive. shouldn't this dominate the conversation? If this was his biological child would we then be able to fully appreciate the trash that he is? Or is it that we just refuse to hold [black] men to any standards of decency when it comes to caring for children??

  • luVn_liFe…
  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    I just read a story about some dude beating his girlfriends 7 month old and purposely breaking his bones?. Someone anonymously called CPS and they found the child, now the child is on life supprt. The dude gave the cops a DETAILED confession that was too graphic to speak on???

  • PK

    Totally agree!

  • luVn_liFe…

    FCUKIN Ridiculous!!!!!!

  • hi-liter

    Evil

  • T Willis

    And with abortion becoming illegal again ? these baby mamas are going to have to start taking sex ed classes with the 6th graders to understand that condom + birth control pills/pads/injections etc = planned parenthood = no b@$tards. This logic escapes them for some reason ?????

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    EVERY PERSON who harms a child PURPOSELY MUST DIE IMMEDIATELY!

  • GrandHustleGirl1

    Say it again! I'm gainfully employed and fully educated but I will tell everyone...I am not wrapped too tight when it comes to my daughter and I will kill. F the consequences." My baby is 18, and I STILL check her whereabouts and to heck with a sleepover.

  • luVn_liFe…

    YUP..dont get me started on the ban on abortions. https://media3.giphy.com/media/tPdYQaW6oCIOA/giphy.gif

  • Chicagowise

    Given the mother's history of poor choices, if it wasn't Darion, it would have been someone just like him.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs
  • Lisa Left Eye

    So basically Darion and the hypothetical other man would both be murderous trash. Unfortunately i don't doubt that the number of men who fit that criteria is numerous. Let's shun men like that

  • Chicagowise

    I'm not so sure about that. I believe some people are natural born predators.

  • Navybeans95

    That's so foul....but you're right..

  • Alextra Ballard

    Cdfuuuu yew StewpidT

  • And then there is that!

    Not really. There are a lot men/women that are capable and have huge hearts to love kids that are not theirs. I know several, me being one. My brother, my bonus father, my mom, my best friend who is a male, my ex boyfriend. I can name a plethora of men that are like Russell. They just don't get the exposure and love. Being a bonus parent is often a thankless job. But you get a joy that you can love someone as much as your own. But POS like these men/women in these articles control the narrative!

  • Hazel

    Preach! My daughter is 16, drives, and I track her EVERY move on a free app called LIFE360. Literally if she is stopped at a light for too long....she gets a call from me!! She doesn't have to ever tell me where she is 'cause I already know!

  • Renee

    That males were getting with women, not for a relationship with them but to groom the daughters to be molested. He told me trust no one!

  • Renee

    Correct!

  • Renee

    Facts!

  • Li-Wright

    Get married. That's all I got to say. You get pregnant, marry the man. Give the baby a name. Involve the father in the baby's life.

  • Tina

    I went through that with my ex boyfriend, he would leave his kids with me on the weekends while he worked. I'm thinking these are not my kids so why should I be responsible for them? Why am I giving up my weekends for something I had nothing to do with? My current boyfriend tried to do the same thing by bringing his kids over on my days off, but I checked him really quick. I said to him" I didn't sign up for this, you did, so enjoy"!!! I'm not sacrificing my free time for anyone's life choices!!

  • Jay

    I love this picture of her. Such a beautiful Angel

  • Bonita

    This post sure seemed to scare away a lot of the isht talkin, troll azz niccas that usually have something to say on all the other posts.

  • mzwhang90210

    I agree with the above.
    I also have an additional theory...
    Dudes tell single working mothers that they can help the woman save $$$ by letting him watch the kids while he stays at her crib & (allegedly) looks for a job. I'm sure the mothers agree initially bc after all, he gets along so well with her kids (around her), so she feels safe & is somewhat relieved that her childcare issues are so easily solved. She won't need daycare, or mamma nem to babysit, her bf LeRon will do it. Besides, she's going to be calling & checking in periodically, so what could go wrong? It's a win/win as far as mom is concerned. Yayyy!
    Then, while the mother is at work, LeRon is eating her babies snacks, laying up in the A/C or heat, on the couch twiddling & cracking his toes-- & watching tv... or using the computer, or on the phone texting/talking with other chicks, or closed up in the bedroom getting high, or sleep, or whatever.
    But then when the kid(s) DARE make too much noise while playing, or wet themselves, or break something..or clamor for attention, or complain that they're hungry...LeRon who in reality has little to no patience...snaps-- and then jerks, hits, punches, slaps or otherwise abuses the kids. Then probably threatens the kids if they tell.
    LeRon calls/texts the mother like "Lil man man & Erika was jumping on the couch again and Erika fell. She ok tho."
    The mom is kinda concerned, but she gets home, dude has cooked dinner, probably cleaned the house, and the kids back up his story. Wash, rinse, repeat. SMH.

  • Mr.LeBrickJames

    True. Most developed countries are way ahead of the U.S. in terms of the child-care options they provide for their citizens. We're really backward here when it comes to certain things, and child care is a big one of those things... (not to mention just health-care in general).

  • Ni Ni

    On another site, young hoodrats are offended at that thought of not being able to leave their kids with their boyfriend. Their argument is why should he be your boyfriend if you cant trust him. I just smh at the ignorance. Their parents failed them; these young women are living in la la land at the expense of their child's innocence.

  • Tina

    It's also unfair for the new person in someone's life to have to deal with all of that baggage.

  • NeverSurprised

    ?

  • KcoolMuziq

    #2

  • Ni Ni

    Smh

  • Ni Ni

    ?

  • MsSapphire9800

    Shyt husbands kill their children too...and the mother. Sorry some parents are just crazy. Do you remember the father that after killing the wife... shot his 2 sons and blew up the house.

  • hottlanta

    iD channel fatal vows n who the bleep did l marry shows back 2 back married murderers.

  • chan chan

    It’s not ignorance it’s laziness

  • NeverSurprised

    Are we going to pretend it's just BOYFRIENDS committing these heinous crimes? Please be reminded that Martin Pereira, the heartless animal who locked 3 year old Zoey inside a car, CHAINED it shut, then then BURNED HER ALIVE was her BIOLOGICAL FATHER.

    These torturous acts against children can be committed by ANY MAN, whether or not he has a bioligical connection to the child.

  • MsSapphire9800

    People think marriage is the answer to everything...having children out of wedlock...get marry....boyfriend kill your children...get marry....man beating your ass...get marry..on welfare...get marry...Lawd some people just snap and do shyt you would never thought that person would do.

  • Solstice

    ? Yes! “Should” is the keyword though…smh. ?

  • mzwhang90210

    Girllllll..they LOVE to sneak up behind you, to see what you're typing on the computer or what you're doing on your phone. I used to work with one that took an hour for her 15 min break..then would come back and take an hour for her 30 min lunch...but had the NERVE to ask ME where I went if I was late coming back from MY lunch break. SMH

  • PrettyMeka08

    ? She would have Nair in her shampoo or conditioner bottle too. We both gon’ be bald up in here.

  • xxxgracious

    As a single mom myself I don't play that ish. Even with his slow a$$ daddy who claims he has no attachment due to being deployed and active duty. Claims the military made him that way. Once he told me that he lost all his chances on getting our child alone. Whenever he does visit (which is once a year for 3 days although I know his lying a$$ tells me this so he can spend the remainder of his week partying at clubs) I speak to his mother. I always let her know that I can't control what happens when I leave my son in her care but to please make sure my child is okay. Sadly she agrees with me. She knows her son ain't ish and is slowly giving up having a relationship with him. My son is the oldest and his daughter is 2 months younger than mine with some psycho nigerian. (Broke off the engagement after he told me when I was 8 months prego). He ended up marrying some German girl for 8 months before she divorced his sorry butt and now he claims he dating "some bad asian". If only I could time travel back to 2014 smfh. I'm worried about the women he's going to have around his kids. That's my biggest fear.

  • NeverSurprised

    It's both.

  • Chapter29Chick

    I totally agree with a majority of what u wrote. However, alot of women are single mothers who have been married. Why u ask? Because they don't want to play the fool while their man is playing with their heart. So in other words marriage will lock u n with a fool while u r trying to keep the family together in some cases. STDs don't care if u r married. Ijs let's not overlook that fact. I'm married and may be a single mom if I find out my husband is creeping and sleeping around because I'm nobodys fool. This is why I would never judge a single mother. Blessings to the single mommies out there.

  • Brown & Proud

    Spot on!

  • anonymouse

    It's really best to leave dudes with kids alone, they have obligations that aren't yours and will always try to burden you with it.

  • Treasureme

    LeRon tho lmfao
    But seriously, you nailed it.

  • mzwhang90210

    @disqus_kRwjb46BP9:disqus Girl noooooooo...are you serious??What did your dad say?

  • GrandHustleGirl1

    I know that's right!!!??? I Google track my baby. I did NOT raise her this far to fall prey to somebody foolishness.

  • Li-Wright

    The problem is the woman doesn't know how the boyfriend interacts with HIS OWN KIDS. Many of the men have children elsewhere. How do they treat their own kids? Do they visit? Does he join his kids with your kids on trips? Comeon, there are ways to know if a man can be trusted with your kids.

  • GinJen

    Preach sis!!!

  • GrandHustleGirl1

    They thought it was funny when I said I'll take somebody clean out over my baby and then crip walk into the penitentiary like I live there and I'm used to that life. ???

  • Solstice

    Dayum ? down to the new growth?!?!? ????? Pardon my yelp Nae! It’s not funny but her ass was trifling as hell for that. Did your mom get involved? Cause I would have ??

  • Solstice

    LMMFAO!!! ??????!! You said EVERYBODY gone be bald today!!! ????

  • GrandHustleGirl1

    ?????

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    Bloop!

  • mzwhang90210
  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    Yep!

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    You are absolutely right!

  • Michelle

    This needs to be posted everywhere for the idiots that dump their children off with anyone.

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    I agree!

  • smartchickfl

    Dumb fu*ks. Sorry, but I had to.

  • hottlanta

    None of us r safe.

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    Sandra, thank you for this write up because it's the truth but also include why men shouldn't be so quick to leave their kids with any and all women. Some women will love and spoil another man's child just because that's their natrual personality but some women will do just what this man did to this little baby.

    A story was posted not to long ago about the step mother starving the boyfriend's daughter to death. The baby girl was chained to the bed, while her son ran around, ate and played like a normal kid. I cried reading that story too because just like the baby in this story, she was innocent and defenseless. Some women can be just as evil to kids that are not theirs, as some men can be.

  • mzwhang90210

    IKR....you're like, first of all..WHYYY is she dating a dude named LeRon...that should've been the FIRST red flag! ???

  • MsSapphire9800

    TRUE

  • che’lint

    LOL HAHAHAHA!!! OKAY.

  • DeJeri

    Sounds like a lot sis. Keep your head up.

  • Guest©

    Gotcha. I believe we all have free will. It depends from person to person what one does with that free will.

  • Renee26

    No, I called my daddy thinking he would intervene. He said if the beautician says it needs to be done then let her do it. Because he allowed it she didn't say anything

  • Renee26

    He trusted the adults word that it needed to be done... But I knew I had a head full of healthy hair.

  • Renee26

    We faught plenty of times; nuckled up... 7yr age difference

  • Bree

    Discernment is key and this is why God ordained sex for marriage. We wouldn't have all these problems within our community if we would hold out until marriage or until you find the right person. Some of these men have boys trapped in their bodies. Young, dumb, and full of cum. It's sad that we have breed like rats and our men scatter like roaches. I've learned from the mistakes of others to not just lay down and/or get pregnant by trash. I waited 5 hears for my husband and it was/is the best decision I've ever made. My husband and I will not trust anyone with our kids.

  • Ni Ni

    ?

  • Alextra Ballard

    He wasn’t her first poor choice and he won’t be her last.

  • Raquelle Dellaghetto

    This kid wasn't safe with her own damn mother either. How tf can someone sneak your kid in? How big is your house that you don't hear or see your kid unless she's one of those lazy as s mothers who sleeps for 23 out of 24 hours.

  • currvalicious

    And the rest are just sick & disgusting. That's the par they hide from you but show your kids. Some men show that to the women as well, but they're to "in love" to step in & protect their own children.

  • Chicagowise

    I agree 100%!

  • http://sandrarose.com SandraRose

    True. But the cases of women killing their boyfriend's children are very rare. Cases of men raping, molesting and/or killing their girlfriend's children happens far too often. We must err on the side of caution and stop leaving defenseless children with boyfriends.

  • Kimberly King

    I don't have any kids, but I know I will be just like you. Sometimes I don't want any kids, because I can admit I'm not mentally stable enough to handle anything happening to them. I will literally kill someone in broad daylight and won't think twice. This world is too crazy. I may just put my uterus on ice permanently.

  • Solstice

    ? smh ?????

  • GrandHustleGirl1

    I'll be honest, it is one of the reasons I decided not to have more. She is an only child. This world is nuts. When you do have them, I know you'll keep them close.

  • Kimberly King

    Uh. You went off the deep end. I'm not even talking about cheating husbands and STD's. That's not my fault if they decided to get wifed by a loser. You know what I meant by single mothers: Getting knocked up by random ninjas you don't know. I hold myself to a standard. I could care less about any marriage stat people throw at me. I'm too good to be someone's baby mama. Sh*t, we all are. And I refuse to let a man impregnate me until we are good and married. The way the world is heading, I may not even have kids. And I am not judging single mothers. My mom had me out of wedlock and my sister is a single mother as well. Stop thirsting to find something to argue out. I just want US to do better and hold our spirit, energy and vaginas to a higher f*cking standard. Point. Blank. Periodtttt. ?

  • Solstice

    Hey Whang!! ? How ya been??? ? IKR!! I’ve been crazy busy ? I get in here late so I’ve been missing out on you Roses cutting up. Soon as Sandra lets me post my favorite gifs I’ll be back in full swing ? Sort of ??

  • Kimberly King

    Lol good ! She won't understand now, but trust me when she gets older she will. Predators are everywhere. Gotta protect the kids.

  • Kimberly King

    I will. I just don't want them thinking I'm on their every move because I want to control them. My love will be endless for my babies.

    But then sometimes I feel like when you have a child you can't help but to see your own death. I would fear dying because I would wonder who's going to take care of them after I'm going. It's emotionally draining just thinking about it. I think I just talked myself out of having kids. Lol

  • Kimberly King

    LeRon killed me because I know a trifling ninja back at home with this same name. He's a shade tree mechanic who gets around. Lol

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    I see and agree. I still think people overall (not just women) need to be more cautious about who they leave their kids with. This includes family members too.

  • Eileen

    Smart women that you are...breeding like rats and scattered roaches LOL too funny sad but true... rats and roaches...

  • CaramelDrop

    ?

  • Cliffpetty

    100% facts!

  • Oh Tommie

    Come on with that word nih!! ????

  • joel adams

    Only ONE reason for this NOT to happen.
    WRAP IT UP

  • hottlanta

    I would never forget when l was a child a lil girl killed her father bcas he was molesting her. She never went to no one house to spend the night for a sleepover n no one ever went to their house for a sleepover either.

  • MrsSpice1

    Dont call all women that make mistakes hoodrats. Sadly some women in this world are just lost and desperate for help.

  • Eileen

    these women do not care because if they did this would not happen...

  • MrsSpice1

    The mother can also be added to that equation. But, because you can birth a child doesn’t make one a mother alone. Being a mother especially a good one, is a choice one of mental stability can only make.

  • Coy little wink

    1. #5
    2. #5
    3. #5
    4. #5
    5. See 1-4 above

  • MsPam

    I read about her I think she was sentenced to death.

  • Eileen

    Yelp that sounds like the truth...

  • E-VannaRootsAllEvil

    Very true statements. Some men are great with your kids. My bro in law was with 1 of my sis but I had another sis who was dating someone who didn’t like my nephew. She was constantly in competition with my nephew. This started early in the relationship my sister did nothing about it and it got worst however my nephew was grown. He could beat her azz but still. Get rid of them early when u see that going on

  • MrsSpice1

    At the end of all this, it’s negligence and irresponsibility of the parents or parent that should always be held accountable first in the protection of their seed. This can happen with those at churches schools doctor offices etc...family too. Its just so sad that those you attempt to trust in helping you end up be the ones u shouldn’t. Stories like these i pray are a wake up call to the reality of inhumanity that is exist in false pretenses..

  • Eileen

    Damn it choose wisely and then have your damn kids! I am so sick of this thread! boyfriend step daddy real daddy...oops I mean biological daddy the men in blakistan are shit butt crazy. Black folks have been shit butt crazy since obama came on the scene yeah I said it! We haven't been right since!

  • Chapter29Chick

    Honey I know a woman who meets menz off dating websites all the time, she has 5 kids and house full of roaches. I feel for those babies ?.

  • Eileen

    You are so right...If you want to know about life look at the animal shows they make so much damn sense and we are the highest order but stupid as hell! I am so tired of black folks acting like idiots! we don't marry we breed with crazy manchilds our daughters are overweight our sons act like little bitches ...Yes the globalists are so happy! Trump is not causing this hysteria in our community we are doing it to ourselves with no wm in sight so who are you going to blame? Casper the friendly ghost...smh sadly

  • Blaque Mahogany

    I agree with all of this and would like to point out that the "boyfriend" can also be the biological father.

    I know when it comes to accountability people like to kick the can down the road, but the reality is that women need to take responsibility for whom they choose to breed with and mate with. 80% of the time when a child under the age of 5 is killed by someone other than their parent, the murderer is a male. That's why we are talking about boyfriends. The majority of children killed by their parent are killed by their father.

    Women have got to stop trying to force men into being fathers. Stop thinking about yourself and focus on your child's well being.

  • Chapter29Chick

    Oh gawd this world is so disgusting

  • the guest

    In my opinion, women should not permit any man they are not married to to live in their home with their children. And women should not marry unemployed men with criminal records and history of severe or untreated mental illness or DV records.

    Problem solved.

  • missmiami305
  • missmiami305
  • Blaque Mahogany

    Or is it that we just refuse to hold [black] men to any standards of decency when it comes to caring for children??
    ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
    Does this really sound like a solution? That would be like saying instead of training children to avoid strangers or escape kidnap scenarios, we should focus on holding the pedophiles and murderers accountable. The reality is that as a parent, you have some control. You can control whom you have a child with. You can control who you allow to care for your children.You should take steps to prevent the psychopaths, sociopaths, pedophiles, and other mentally ill from taking advantage or and/or harming your child. I'm not sure why telling a mother not to leave a random azz man alone with her child is so bothersome for some.

  • the guest

    You be the grounded force in your child's life. Sounds like his absence is a blessing in disguise. He's far too active in his dating practices for you to trust his environment and judgement for your child.

  • the guest

    Additionally, however, if Darion wasn't a child murdering piece of trash, the child would still be alive. shouldn't this dominate the conversation?

    THIS!!!!!!

  • Eileen

    and the saga continues.. where are the womens rights groups to help these baby mamas especially the black feminists who run behind Gloria steinman and Alice Walker shouting equality and women's rights where are these hefiers oh I forgot feminism is for the rich and priviledged ww who are lesbians and hate men and the white patriarchy ( whatever that means) and only need poor into their emotions dumb black women to be the numbers they need to continue their destruction of relations between men and women. I am so tired of the fuckery in blakistan. Yes I am on a roll tonight I am just tired...smh

  • Eileen

    STOP dating men with kids! PERIOD! you are better than that! Thank You!

  • CookieMobster

    Right. Why would he even need to "sneak her in"" don't make NO SENSE

  • Yup, I said it

    ? vote!!!

  • Zeta Aggie

    And the poor 17 month old baby that was assaulted so badly she died. I want these women in JAIL with these demons

  • CookieMobster

    I so wish I had waited until marriage. I imagine things would have been so much different, and much better for the sex life as a whole. Damn shame I say!!!

  • Yup, I said it

    Honey, these women ain't trying to hear that. They just know some man is gonna love little Ray Ray Jr. better than his own sorry ass biological pappy does.

  • Yup, I said it

    You better say that. These women are very simple. Most young men that only date women with children are usually looking for a mother and a person to take care of them or they are pedophiles.

    1.Why would a young man want to be tied down with a ready made family?

    2.If he wanted a family why hasn't he started his own?

    3. If he has his own kids and he isnt involved with them why on earth would he be involved with yours?

  • Eileen

    I am Bible-Belted on this God did not design men to be at home with kids! They are providers and protectors NOT nurtures, there is a difference that is why women have their roles and men have theirs and when you try to switch it up in the name of a damn career or gender blender bs everything goes to hell in a handbasket! If I am working why are you a boyfriend at the damn house? watching porn, slapping and abusing my kids, eating my food, booty-snatching bw wake up!

  • Eileen

    uh, nope. I dont condone this single mommy bs MOST women who divorce knew their man was crap to begin with.

  • xxxgracious

    Thanks. It is a blessing. Last time he had our son was Easter. He told me his first bonding experience was teaching him how to pee in the woods because he couldnt find a porta potty at the park. He thought it was funny and I just stared at his dumba$$. I wish I chose a better father.

  • chan chan

    Ok I’ll but that

  • Ni Ni

    It's probably best that he not come around; he doesn't seem stable. Reminds me of a family member that was in the military...some of them just dont come back the same.

  • Ni Ni

    Lol

  • GinJen

    ??simple??as??that!!!

  • mzwhang90210

    And he's calling you at work, talking bout some "WE almost outta bread" ????

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    Awwwwwwwww cuteness overload! Hes been trained so well.

  • GinJen

    ??????

  • wigmon68

    there is absolutely nothing wrong with a mother allowing a responsible boyfriend to watch her kids. The problem is the choice of boyfriend. If the man can't be trusted to be with your kids, then he shouldn't be in your life

  • mzwhang90210

    @blaquemahogany:disqus Right!
    If dude tells you he doesn't want kids, or suggests that you have an abortion when you tell him you are pregnant, TAKE HEED.
    None of this, "Well, when the baby gets here, he'll feel different."
    Noooo mami....he TOLD you how he felt already. Take care of your baby and hope he'll come around to be a father, but DON'T try to force or guilt him into it.

  • ?? Kari ?????????

    I read Bowen’s had dumped him as her fiancé. Then went and left Maleah with him! I can’t believe she would even let this happen since he’s the cause of her head injury! She just as much as fault of this! She’s trying to keep her rump out of jail!!

  • Fire & Ice

    I heard about this yesterday. The little boy has died and the charged have been updated to murder. I can't imagine how horrifying and painful this was for that child ?

  • Jussjess25

    This is just the saddest thing in the world.. and the worst part is her mother may never know what happened to her. That coward will probably never confess. Smdh

  • Shaylove1975

    A woman recently left her toddler with someone she trusted in a motel and the child was sexually assaulted and died. This should become a law about leaving these babies with just anyone like that.

  • Blaque Mahogany

    Exactly. I have a friend that really really wants kids. Her bf of over 5 years has told her on multiple occasions he doesn't want kids. One day they were talking about estate planning and he said something about it only being the two of them. He does this all the time...but she insists that he may feel differently later. If she ends up pregnant and he disappears or is completely detached (emotionally and otherwise) from the child, I don't want to hear shyt.

  • Lisa Left Eye

    Its not wrong to tell a mother not to leave her kids with a man, (although unfortunately biological fathers e.g. Martin Perriera do vile things too so I'd say the wickedness of these men is the problem more so than their blood relationship to the child) but it's an incomplete message. this is akin to when black families tell little girls so say away from some old perverted relative instead of just ex communicating the vile old man. It's as if our people have made nurturing and compassion for children mandatory for mothers/women, but optional for fathers/men. Some black men are in a perpetual state of childhood because if ever there is a woman even tangentially connected to the vile things they do, the blame placed on the woman makes the bad deeds of the man an after thought

  • Robert lee Bennett OG

    maybe men should not date women with kids it nips a lot if this stuff in the bud

  • NewNew

    Sounds like the children issues should be a deal breaker fpr your friend. If it means that much to her she needs to leave and find a man who wants the same things in life that she does.

  • NewNew

    Makes no sense because she's lying like a damn rug.

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    I saw that too. What people take for granted is this type of stuff is happening every day to our babies all over this world. We deserve whatever ending humanity has coming to us because we as a species ain't about shitt when it comes to our responsibilities regarding the innocent. We too busy giving a damn about sports contracts and how many babies the Kardashians design.

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    Luuuvvvvvvvvvvv you for the QUEEN input!
    "a lot of black women think it's cute or acceptable. It's not"
    Please stop having kids young.

  • NewNew

    For some men, however they feel about the mother is how they feel about the child. The man who burned his daughter alive (how horrific) was mad at the mother and probably wanted to physically hurt her but couldn't. The child was an extension of the mother and now look, the mother is in more pain now than anyone could ever imagine.
    He achieved his goal. Same as how when some men no longer want to be present in the mother's life then they are no longer present for the child. If the man treated the mother like a possession then guess what, he thinks of the children as a possession as well. Some men would fight an army alone just to protect their children but sadly I think they are less plentiful than the ones who are able to walk away without a care.

    So my thought is this: Beware of leaving your child with a bio father who resents you. The hell he plans for you may be the one he visits upon your child. As difficult as it may be, it's in the child's best interest for the mother to get along with, or at least lessen the resentment/anger of, the father. Either that or be ok with him not being present in the child's life .

  • NewNew

    It's both sis. Everyone needs to do and be better. You're not wrong, in fact you are right. But at the end of the day one can only control his or her own actions. We can't force these men to be better people but we can mitigate the risks. I should be able to walk down the street naked without being assaulted but I can't control a person's reaction to my nakedness. I can, however, put some clothes on. Will wearing clothes 100% prevent me from being raped? No. Will it lessen the risk of being raped significantly as opposed to being naked? Yes, yes it will.

  • NewNew

    All valid questions

  • NewNew

    I see what you did there ?

  • NewNew

    Jesus ??

  • Bree

    I was just telling my mom about this story and how I'm not judgemental. But if you want to lay around and have sex, have sex all day if you want, but please don't bring innocent kids into the picture. Either get on birth control or use condoms. These things weren't made for nothing. Kids shouldn't have to pay for their parents lust addiction!

  • Bree

    When I was sexually active, (not married), I hated it. It was so unfulfilling and I'm not one that has had multiple partners. 5 years of celibacy changed my life. I experienced what it's like to make love without being touched by husband. Felt like I was losing my virginity for the first time. All my husband has to do is look at me and I'm pregnant! ?? I'm not pregnant by the way. But that's thanks to God!

  • YouWontSayItButIWill

    That part..

  • Bree

    Yes. It saddens me. We see stories of abandonment, abuse, and all these other issues. Maury has more paternity tests galore. How is it that we don't learn from things like that? The example is always in front of us. It is up to us to want change.

  • Bree

    I like the Kardashians, however, I don't see why people are obsessed with them. Their show use to be fun to watch, but they started doing all these crazy things for money. And the fact that they keep having all these mixed babies has me upset. Babies are not accessories. The world is coming to an end.

  • YouWontSayItButIWill

    I am confused as to why this mother hasn't been charged. "He must have snuck her in"? Bish...you're a mother and don't know where your baby girl is AT ALL times....and the child is right in the house with you? What type of bafoonery is that? Blood found in the house? Tissue? Where was it found? The mother didn't see that? Am I the only one that thinks the mother might have had something to do with it? Something in the milk ain't clean...............

  • Bree

    I don't think she had anything to do with it. I believe apart of her is in complete shock and it will take some time for her to get over this. It has not hit her yet. I don't think she waited because she wanted to. I think maybe she was in denial or was afraid of him. She may still be afraid to face the truth because as a mother, she did nothing to protect her offspring out of fear for her own life or she felt the need to cover for him because she was in love with him. Either way, she will have to answer to God.

  • Bree

    I'm not sure that will work. Everybody is not the same. I always prayed for a husband with no children. Too much drama and of course things like this happen. I am also a product of a blended family. People only tolerate you, just because. And there's nothing wrong with that.

  • YouWontSayItButIWill

    The entire black community has kids. It's nearly impossible to meet people whom are childless................especially women at that. C'mon now..theses days..by the time these women are 21 they are on the pole and have at least 3 kids.....by various sperm donors.

  • Bree

    I lost a friend over something like this. Her son's father and I were cool before he started having sex with her. She didn't know I knew him until after their encounters. He told me he did not want her to have their kids while she was pregnant with twins. I fussed at him because I told him he was wrong for stringing her along. I also warned her because somebody told me to. I told him he should leave her alone. He told me he hope the kids die. They died at birth. She beat me up for it and told me where to go.

  • Alextra Ballard

    A lot of men shy away from wimmen with kids

  • Bree

    I'm in my 30s and so is my husband. When we met, I was single with no kids. My husband does not have any kids either. We will have kids when God says so. Some people have to move around. The goods are still out there.

  • missmiami305

    Curious to know who your loyalty was to at the time. Seems like it was to him. This sounds like a recipe for disaster. The term “friend” seems to be overly used. If folks treat their friends like this....lord how do you treat your enemies. You deserved that ass whooping for playing both sides ?????.

  • Bree

    That's true. As a woman, I shy away from men with kids. I was grateful to meet my husband, single with no attachments.

  • YouWontSayItButIWill

    I don't have kids and neither does my boyfriend believe it or not. It is still people out here like yourself and your husband; and like me and my boyfriend. However people like us are rare...trust this.

  • Bree

    Never played both sides. My loyalty was too her. I knew her longer than him. I knew him through someone else. It had been years since I'd seen him. She was so wrapped up in him that I tried to warn her that he was no good. By the way, she didn't put her hands on me. When I say she beat me up, I was referring to her words. I would never physically fight her, she meant too much to me. I never treated her badly. Throughout her pregnancy, I was at her side. I even put my life on the line for her during that time.

  • Bree

    I believe you. I'm a God chaser. I know there are still a remnant preserved for great things. All is not lost in this world. People don't learn from their mistakes or the mistakes of others. I'm a fast learner. So is my husband and he has taught me alot about this thing called life. Glad I waited for the right person to lead me. We are having fun on our journey. Can't wait to give him babies though.

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    the second she didn't protect her baby from day one of screening him, having suspicions, and not acting on those suspicions, she had absolutely everything to do with her inevitable harm and death. She protected this monster until five point two seconds after she was notified she was in caught in the home the last time this baby was seen alive. Come on Bree......she wasn't too afraid to jump on a plane without her baby

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    maybe people simply shouldn't be pedophiles. a pedo is a pedo... I don't care who they date or what circumstances they are in

  • Bree

    I'm not disagreeing with what you're saying. I totally get it. As a mother, I'm trying to give her the benefit of the doubt. I've wondered about case. Although, I don't know any of these people. I want to believe that she was afraid because it pisses me off to think she had something to do with this baby's disappearance. I'm not a mommy yet, but I will die to protect my cub. My husband knows this.

  • Solstice

    It’s almost nuts at this point! ? Wow!! No you’re not the only one. Mom has gotta be involved ?

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    when you have a baby, you will give this bitch no benefits what so ever. I do understand you protecting your sanity. This case is hard to swallow.

  • Bree

    It really is. I feel connected because it's close to home. I live in Houston. I don't have kids but working with kids everyday and having the opportunity to help family, I've raised a few. I hope that Vence will come clean about this baby's whereabouts so that she can have a proper burial.

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    I feel you, I partly grew up near First Colony,H-Town is my hometown. This is Texas, I'm not sure why these adults are still alive... I need my city to step up. ... ESPECIALLY THE BIO DAD. I'm in California now and completely LIVID!!!!!!!!!!

  • Bree

    True. I am so tired of seeing Vence's face on television and on these sites that report the news. I'm confused as to what gratification he has by not revealing where he buried her or threw her out. I have always prayed that no one brings me or that I ever get to a place to harm a child. Some of these kids may need their butts whipped but that's all I'll do.

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    bio dad needs to bail ol boy out, put a bullet to his head, and put the handcuffs on himself. COULDN'T BE MY CHILD!!!!

  • Bree

    But wasn't the bio dad under investigation also with the mother when the kids were taken into state custody?

  • Lisa Left Eye

    I have no issue with that. But even in our message to mitigate the risk (which no doubt is a good message), let's be equally as loud in shaming men (or ppl for that matter) who are trash. My frustration with the response to these type of stories is that they ONLY blame what the mom could have done better

  • Yup, I said it

    They act like its a punishment to have to be responsible with their own reproductive capabilities. If you want to have kids like a Duggar then you better have them with somebody like Jim Bob Duggar, Future or Pierre "Pee" Thomas. In other words you better get you a partner that his making bread and doesn't mind taking care of you while you stay barefoot and pregnant, like some queen in the beehive. The caveat to that is if you bank on a man taking care of you and you kids is dumb in the first place.

  • T Willis

    Exactly

  • Dowoop

    I believe no dad lives out of state with his new family.

  • Dowoop

    Not true. I know quite a few people in their 30s with no kids.

  • Yup, I said it

    That is so true. If your partner tells you they don't want kids then you need to take that to heart. Anyone that honest needs to be heard. They are telling you that,to protect any unwanted kids from being born. They may hate kids, they may have pedo urges, they may have a family history of disease or mental illness or sexual abuse. If they are self loathing they may hate a kid that reminds them of themselves. Women and men need to stop thinking that a baby fixes relationships. A whining, crying, pissing, pooping, sleep depriving, financially draining kid isnt gonna solve a damn thing.

  • Yup, I said it

    4 yr olds stomp when they walk and run thru your house talking loud with they outside voices. Even when they tip toe and whisper its still loud as hell. How did she not know the kid was in the house. Plus on the video,camera the little girl,was running behind her the bf so that means she was already hyper once she got in the house.

  • Yup, I said it

    Preach! Once a man shows obsessive, violent, dominating, vindictive, spiteful, and hateful tendency leave him alone. Do not procreate with him. Do not subject your children to a brute for a father. Women think all men will love a child more they love themselves and thats rarely the case.

  • Yup, I said it

    Child abuse and molestation is a symptom of a culture of fatherless people and society of broken homes. The women are searching for love so they have a baby and try to create the family they never had. The bio father dips and the mother dates whomever she can convince to play daddy. Usually the new boyfriend is fatherless also and jobless. He was never taught to be a man and provide and protect the household. He sees himself as another one of the kids the girlfriend is responsible for. Those type of men were also raised in single mother households and may have raised their younger siblings. That's why that man would rather do domestic work than get a job but he has always resented his mother for putting him in a "bitxch role" as a kid and has and underlying resentment and hatred for females because of it. The cure to this is going back to a complete family structure and incorporating grandparents into the equations. Grandma's today work full time jobs and have a boyfriend themselves, so nobody really can focus on raising the kids. The broken home model doesnt work. The children end up playing adult roles in the home to help the single parent. Especially when its their are several kids to care for.

  • Chocolate

    Agreed. And vice versa. I’ve never thought dating people with kids, male or female, was a good idea.
    Who wants the responsibility of children that aren’t theirs?
    Then it’s like, you’re good enough to spend money on them or devote time and resources, but u can’t discipline them and are subject to harassment and conflict from their bio parent, who is often times bitter and dramatic/unreasonable.
    No one is worth all this, sorry.
    And anyone that pretends someone is, has alterior, selfish motives.
    Hard pass.

  • NeverSurprised

    You’ve stated the various reasons for the problem quite accurately. What you haven’t noted is the EXTENT of the problem — 72% of black children are being raised by single mothers.

    When you realize that THAT MANY CHILDREN are being raised by women who are desperate to have a male in the household, women who THEMSELVES were raised without fathers, you understand the near hopelessness of the situation. The unwed pregnancies keep coming, the men keep leaving, the young women keep allowing anything with a pen!s into their homes to fill the void and the children continue to be the targets of abuse.

    Finally, there are forces at work in society that WANT black families to remain broken and unstructured. The political entities that blacks THINK are their most loyal “ friends” NEVER EVER UTTER A WORD ABOUT ABSENTEE BLACK FATHERS. And anyone who DOES mention the need for black men to STOP ABANDONING THEIR FAMILIES Iis called “racist” and is immediately silenced. Why? Why would the party that loves black people “ to death” ignore the one thing — the broken black family — that is now causing the deaths of so many innocent black children?

    Can we save our children? Can we salvage our race? Or is the current generation of young black men and weomen too far gone for help?

  • NeverSurprised

    I had my son at 36, after I had completed college, law school and was running my first business. None of my girlfriends in law school had children before marriage. Not a single, solitary one of them. Women who understand the importance of education (REAL education, not a community college certificate), and career DO NOT run the risk of destroying their futures by having children in their teen years.

  • http://batman-news.com Roderick2011

    Child abuse and molestation is a symptom of a culture of fatherless people and society of broken homes

    Wrong. The person who molested me had both parents in the household.

    Most molestation unfortunately occurs within the family (incest).

  • NeverSurprised

    A PLEA TO THE FEW REMAINING “GOOD” BLACK MEN:

    Even though 72%of black men abandon their children, we know that not ALL of you have lost your humanity. To those of you who care about what is happening to OTHER people’s innocent children, I beg of you to begin to ostracize these monsters.

    This animal felt safe in going to his brother’s house. He knew he would be welcomed with open arms. The thousands of OTHER black men who are abusing children know they can still go hang out with their “boys”, shoot some hoops, call black women bitches and hoes, maybe even laugh about how they slapped some “bitche’s” kid upside the head for “disrespecting” him. What do you good black men do in that situation?

    Do you laugh along with him? Do you shake your head, yet STILL SOCIALIZE WITH HIM? Or do you call him out for what he is, an animalistic abuser of children? Do you let him know that REAL men will no longer tolerate a child abuser in their presence? Do you do the right thing, or do you remain silent?

    These creatures hate women, but they just might fear other men. If the good black men start ACTING LIKE MEN, maybe, just maybe, we can begin to save just one child before it's too late.

  • http://batman-news.com Roderick2011

    That's not a solution.

    The solution is to have that person removed from the family and put in an institution.

    The person who molested me was my cousin and he showed being a pervert at an early age.

    My mom caught him watching her get undressed when he was a kid, but his parents didn't do anything about him after she told him.

    I am pretty sure I am not the only one in the family he molested.

  • Y’all Jealous Cuz I’m Prudy

    I wish I could upvote this 1 million times. This is the truth.

  • Yup, I said it

    Sorry to hear that. Its awful when children suffer. There are always perverts and bad people, however its a nature vs. nuture thing at play too. Neglet tends to create these type of situations but your youre right a monster can be raised in a perfect household also.

  • Yup, I said it

    Jesus, these stories break my heart. People dont understand how mental illness works. A person with a deranged or perverted mind cannot be trusted to have self control. They have to be institutionalized, registered as predators and monitored for life. If a persons is is a pedo they can't just stop being a pedo. That urge compells them. They need a lobotomy and to be locked up. I dont have children because this world is so evil I cant image bringing a precious baby in to this.

  • NeverSurprised

    It feels like such an insurmountable problem, so I'm trying to think of anything and everything that MIGHT help.

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    1. We blk men have lost our kingdoms "khemet" and emulating white men. 2.I choose not to associate with blk men that aren't woke "don't have a clue what white supremacy is and who their God is." 3.I hear married men unmarried men calling their wives and fiances bitches at work and in stores. 4. Russel Wilson is a simp to most blk guys when he should be a hero a, role model. 5.This is what happens when we serve other races God. The universal laws and statues,laws of Ma'at aren't being followed. 6.Blk men need to kill thier ego toxic masculinity emulating white culture and respect blk women,our beautiful blk queens 7.Black women are not our enemy or competition but our equal.We always got to have one up one the blk woman.

  • NewNew

    You're right again. We're all right, really.

    I do think that, because this blog is visited by mostly women, we tend to hold other women to a higher standard. It's like, from one woman to another, we just can't imagine how she could be so stupid! When this story first broke there was a healthy amount of vitriol directed to the boyfriend in the story, but the more we hear about how depraved the mother is the more we can't stand her (and with good reason). At the end of the day Maleah was HER child and she wantonly kept her in a dangerous environment. She should have, and did, know better. It goes without saying (although it should continue to be said) that the murderer is the most at fault.

  • Blaque Mahogany

    I'm posting this here because I can't find the original post and I'm tired of clicking "show more replies".

    Pt 1.

    Soooo a lot of people think that the focus should be placed on "exiling" or condemning the man. The example of the perverted uncle was given. It's a poor analogy/example in my opinion but let's examine it nonetheless. Obviously if someone is a known abuser they should not be around children. Period. However, that still doesn't change the fact that the parents of said child should not give that individual access/opportunity to abuse the child. The parent should not allow that individual in their home and they damn sure shouldn't allow their child to be alone with said person at any time.

  • NeverSurprised

    "4. Russel Wilson is a simp to most blk guys when he should be a hero a, role model. "
    -----------

    Yes, yes, a thousand times yes!!! How did we become so twisted a race of people that a man who MARRIES the woman he loves, waits until that marriage to have children, and then becomes a loving father not only to his own child, but to the child of another man -- in what universe is this accomplished, remarkable, loving family man called a " simp"?

  • Blaque Mahogany

    Pt. 2

    A better analogy in my opinion would be the pedestrian crossing the street. We tell people to look both ways before crossing the street, even when they have the right away. Yes, there are people that have looked both ways and still been injured. But, looking greatly minimizes the chances and it makes more sense to do it instead of not doing it. It wouldn't make sense for us to place more focus on the person that blows the stoplight or the stop sign, because we usually can't identify them until after they run someone over. Then we punish them. But until then, I think most people would argue that hoping that the police remove all bad drivers from the road is not in the best interest of self preservation.

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    Aparently ,generations of fatherless homes ,toxic media and music has raised us.

  • Topic Influencer

    Yes. Bc they had to investigate him in order to give him shared custody. All of the CPS records have been released. They also had a hearing coming up on perm. residency as the kids were going to possibly be placed with "family members". I want to know which fam. Moms or dads. The remaining two kids did NOT get placed back with moms fam/maternal grandma and if Maleah is found alive it has been decided by the state she is to go with bio dads fam.

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    The biggest concern of most blk men isn't upholding blk family structure and pride but is to have a surplus of p!ssy.
    That usually incur multiple baby mommas since we don't have a strong financial foundation to begin with.

  • CardiB’sAbs

    Amen!

  • EMILY POST

    Omg this goes beyond your boyfriend not being your babysitter. It’s the fact of the danger of having babies and not being with a strong family structures and being with the men you are having kids by.

  • Yup, I said it

    That last statement?
    People don't want to be accountable and responsible for their decisions for them and their kids safety. Thats why they get mad when you say they need get a background report, credit check, references, paychecks stubs, college and high school transcripts and letters of recommendation before they have any boyfriends living with them and their kids. Don't just some dude off the corner up in your house because he got good sex.

  • TransMichelle

    Also women get "sex" mixed up with "love." Men can have sex with the most gorgeous woman, perhaps even love her and sleep with someone else if caught at the right time. The man could be sleeping with you to get to your child. Men don't have the same "feelings" like women. Society needs to stop pushing this liberal bullsh*t that men and women are the same. Like we can switch bodies and sh*t easily with this transgender mess. A lot of these women are desperate (they want to be with somebody, hell anybody) and see the warning signs, but go ahead anyway. Women always think they can "change a man." REMEMBER: There is ALWAYS a warning sign. Choose to ignore it at your own risk!

  • hottlanta

    My heart is broken in a thousand peices this morning when l heard a man stabbed his wife while their kids were in school. What do u have 2 say about husbanddad is a murderer n mom was with the man she had kids by n died anyway.

  • http://batman-news.com Roderick2011

    You were .looking for INTIMACY but intimacy and sex ARE NOT interchangeable.

  • http://batman-news.com Roderick2011

    KJBOSS:The biggest concern of most black men isn't upholding blk family structure and pride but is to have a surplus of p!ssy.
    Unfortunately that is true but it's a remnant of slavery and a feature of toxic masculinity.

  • RespectSelf

    I couldn't be with someone that I don't trust around my kids. That's crazy!!! If you can't trust him or her with your kids then you do not need to be with them. And there be signs that folks got some other stuff with them smh

  • Victor Nathan

    it is not easy taking care of someone else's baby while the biological is busy humping and boinking anything in skirt without the hindrance of his offspring. Many women think they are domesticating the boyfriend when they leave their child for him to babysit.

  • Shamwow

    Even biological dad has signs. They always do, check out that Susan Powell story. It’s on oxygen and YouTube. Her father in law kept old underwear, nail clippings, hair and used tampons in ziplock bags. Creeps always have signs periodt.

  • Shamwow

    This!!! We all have a choice to continue toxic patterns or change. We all have a choice.

  • Tahj

    "4. Russel Wilson is a simp to most blk guys when he should be a hero a, role model. "....... THIS.

  • https://www.facebook.com/app_scoped_user_id/YXNpZADpBWEZA5T0thTUNKR0JFbTVwUGZAZANVNqaS02WXFCSG45QnRteVByWm0wejhuQ3lGNE9GYjhISXdsUlRxZAEIzZAzBxbnFYdGI2dnBvVDBnc0dLMFNlRmFiXzNzZAW5mNGtaRHFucXMZD/ Toya M. Gibson

    I took my Daughter to Sonic yesterday and as she ordered her food I noticed an female employee sitting taking her break. While we were waiting, a young Man with 3 kids walked up. They were her children, a 8 year old girl and two boys. 4 and 5 years old. The Man was wearing a belt hanging from his neck and you could visibly see the fear on their faces. She asked "but why you gotta walk around with a belt with my' kids"..unquote. I'll spare yall his response. She then ordered all of them some food. This is all in the midst of us praying for Maleah to be found. Alk I could do is pray for them but naturally, I wondered why is (this) so wide spread? If we get on the Nen who procreate the kids and abandon them, they get mad. If we tell the Ladies to be more cautious, they'll say "how, we gotta work..who else is going to keep them?"
    Its a sad, reoccurring story. Btw, those kids look traumatized and somewhat unclean. My heart breaks thinking of them...I somehow know, she has no family support.

  • Karen Brady

    Or they may just know that parenting is not in their wheelhouse. I LOVE my nieces & nephews but have always known (since I was a kid) that I didn't want to have children. I'm no pedo nor am I mentally ill or any of the other things you listed. Plenty of 'normal" people just know it's not for them and take a different path down lfe.

  • Guest

    THIS: I dont have children because this world is so evil I cant image bringing a precious baby in to this.

    My exact reasons for being an AWESOME AUNTIE only, NO REGRETS!

  • Guest

    GOD BLESS your UNION and your future Babies.

  • Renee Lovelace

    i dated a guy who was divorced with two grown daughters who had cut him out of their lives. Everytime I asked about it, he said "oh, they mad at me cuz I cheated on their mother"....come to find out, he had been at HIS OWN DAUGHTER from age 5 to 11 then the mamma kicked his ass out when it was discovered. I FEEL SO DIRTY I WANT TO KILL THAT MOFO. UGH UGH UGH

  • Karen Brady

    :-)

  • Jordan’s Memory

    Wait am I missing something? are you trying to say he molested his own daughter from 5-11 and the mother ONLY kicked him out when she found out?

  • Tammie Reed

    I hate when women do this and have seen it often, no you cant sit with my kids, I will take them with me lol. More women need to adhere to this and have standards! Hell I could be married to a guy but if you aint the dad, nawl, let me figure it out lol. Trust NOONE with your babies, I don't give a damn who they are and how you feel about them! Some men pray on women with kids and they can be any gender...folks nasty and can't be trusted!

  • hottlanta

    U r lying. Tampons. Ole dirty dog.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    Can you rewrite this so we can understand?

    Did you MEAN to type “ He had been MOLESTING his own daughter from age 5-11 and that is why the mom kicked him out NOT because he was cheating!”?

    If so, I would drop DIME on him to the police so that he doesnt molest anyone else’s children!

  • Jordan’s Memory

    OMG that is so sad and makes me angry at the same time. smdh I would NEVER have a man who is NOT their father discipline my kids with a belt idc if he is my husband nobody! hell their father better have a damn good reason to beat my kids with a belt. That's insane and sadly those kids will grow up to hate her for allowing a man to come into their lives and treat them poorly. She probably just met that dude too. smdh When me and my kids dad broke up my ass stayed single until they were old enough to stay in the house by themselves for a couple hours while I go out on a date. I know woman get lonely but you have to do ur job as a parent first because men do not care about ur kids, they just wanna bang mom. Most men don't even have patience for their own kids much less someone else's whom he has no emotional attachment to. I bet that dude lives with her and drives her car all around town smoking weed, yelling at her kids while she at work busting her ass. smdh so sad.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    But your kids shouldnt be the litmus test for trust in a relationship! I would prefer to NOT date then to give my boyfriend full access to my children. The dude should understand your stance! Cant take a chance because the slightest inappropriate incident in a childs life SCARS THEM FOR LIFE!
    Not on my watch???

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs
  • Blaque Mahogany

    I think that's what he/she meant.

    I'm also wondering why he is still walking around .

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    OH, she IS involved! You will SOON see???

  • Blaque Mahogany

    Lol. Just pointing out the ridiculousness.

  • IyanlaVanzantoftheInterWebs

    Especially knowing that man LOVING imbred was molesting her 3 yr old child!
    FIYAH fi DAT!

  • Jordan’s Memory

    I was the same way. I was going to my friends Christmas Party and I told my daughter she was probably 12 at the time lets go so I can take you to a sitter, at the time I was engaged and my fiancé and he was home watching TV, she was like noooooo I wanna just stay here he can watch me. That was the first time I left her. But SHE felt comfortable enough to say I want to stay here I wasn't going to make that decision for her by making her stay. had she not said that I would have never left her there. I'm not gonna force you to be with a man who is not ur dad and I'm not gonna force a man who is not her dad to watch my child. But I said stay in ur room and lock the door if you need him text him, lmao she looked at me like I was nutts. but that was the first time I ever left her with another man who was not her father. lol we was about 3 years into our relationship at that point but it was still was weird because it was the first time.

  • Jordan’s Memory

    The only way it would justify his ass walking around is if he's missing some parts if you know what I mean. Shitttt that still wouldn't be enough.

  • NewNew

    The father was the ultimate creep. Even recorded a song about her

    Lyrics:
    I can love you in a secret way
    I can love you each and every day

    ?

  • NewNew

    Oh my goodness, how horrible

  • Jordan’s Memory

    See that's part of the problem. Some Woman are too trusting, the thought of that two parent household being a family or my kids having a father sometimes clouds their judgement by giving men a chance who shouldn't have one, then when you throw in being desperate for a sitter because you cant afford one but you gotta work and his sorry ass home all day, it makes it even worst. But lets be clear this is just what I see or hear this is not my situation.

  • Renee Lovelace

    Y'all....for REAL i want him to suffer. The daughter is an adult now with a YouTube channel (how I found out....she told) and i never got the real story behind his divorce. I broke up with him a year before i found this all out. I was told to stay out of it by my family, but for real i want TO DO SOMETHING.

  • Jordan’s Memory

    I can imagine you would feel sick to ur stomach that you knew someone personally who would do something like that, especially someone you cared about and trusted. smdh just sick!

  • Jordan’s Memory

    OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  • Karen Brady

    PREACH!!! "I'm too good to be someone's baby mama. Sh*t, we all are. And I refuse to let a man impregnate me until we are good and married."

  • kylla williams

    This bull! If u can’t trust ur man around ur kids u shouldn’t be dating him. Anyone can harm a child! I have a stepfather that raised me from a toddler, it’s plain n simple be careful with anyone around ur children. Biological fathers are capable of the exact same thing

  • Karen Brady

    Idiots!

  • KJBibleOnSlavShips

    Yes for your own safety,please stay out of it.just anonymously tip the cops off

  • Raquel

    ....5 reasons he isn't your kids babysitter.....

    ....and 1 easy, non-detectable way to k*ll that mofo. Getchu a few syringes and add some salt and inject. Tox report won't detect a thing since our bodies already produce salt. This will ensure all body organs shut down. :-)

  • RespectSelf

    Trust would have to be establish well before you leave your kids with your boyfriend. But I will stand by the fact that if I can't trust you with my kids then I can't be with you.

  • RespectSelf

    lol well I couldn't be with a dude that sit at home all day so yea. I get it what you are saying. Most folks are too trusting in general, but why would anyone be with someone that they can't trust with their kids? That makes no sense... and then at what point do you trust them with your kids? Marriage? (that title doesn't change the fact that he may be sick in the head). Forget a boyfriend.... Dads be doing stuff to their own children. So is it Never then?

  • AndSo

    I don't wan to be insensitive but why does a woman with no family support and only a job at Sonic with no babysitter or daycare available have THREE kids? Why? Why didn't she stop at one? Who is the father of these kids? Is it one dad or two or three? And where they be at?

    Bringing children into this crazy world has consequences, for the mother and most importantly for the innocent children.

    If you cannot afford children, then do not have them. Period.

  • Kimberly King

    Girl ! My uterus will be on ice until I get a ring. I'm NOT playing. And I'm sick of black women thinking it's shade towards other black women who are single mothers. I came from a single mother soooo why would I shade ? I'm just stating what I (Kimmy) plan to do with my body.

  • Shaun M

    He is probably repeating the same cycle from his own childhood. His mom allowed some strange man in his home and he is now doing the same thing to someone else’s children. As a mother of three and a grandmother to one, I’ve guarded my children like a hawk from the jump. I don’t trust nobody and please stop letting strange men rule over your kids. He puts on a front for you and terrorizes your poor children when you are not there. So sad.

  • Leigh Burton

    What about all these women who have harmed or killed other men's children?

  • Shamwow

    That’s what I said he was a certified creep.

  • Shamwow

    ???????

  • Shamwow

    It was horrible. The creep had it dated and labeled in freezer bags. It’s on YouTube. The disappearance of Susan Powell.

  • Panther Charleston

    This is some quack science: "Six Brown Chicks wrote a post detailing why women should never leave their children unattended with males who are not their biological fathers." It's nonsense. In the absence of nurturing parents, these characteristics are frequent in tendency across all genders. No one should be able to get away w this quackery. Ion't give no damn what color they skin is or how many of'em said it, no one should be able to get away with lying because they are desperate for change.

  • TheWildChild

    Yes ? and I can't stand the Ear Mafia either always Ear hustling in the office and running back telling ish' ?

  • Panther Charleston

    Exactly. And what about the mother's role in this?

  • MNjumpoffacliff

    After me and their donor broke up my babies didn't see nobody I dated after, my motto is they were for me to see only. My heart aches for this beautiful baby. I just read somewhere that a year long boyfriend sexually assaulted and killed a 17month old today. Crazy

  • Shamwow

    Wow smh I need to finish part 2 .

  • Patricia

    same reasons listed above

  • Patricia

    the truth is you cant trust anyone except the LORD. this is why everybody needs Jesus.

    the only thing single folks should be concerned about is finding out if someone they are interested in is serious about a relationship with Christ. if they live the life of Christ they say they believe in. if they are upstanding men and women of integrity and Gods holy standards. if any man does that, he is equipped to lead a family. if any woman does that, she is equipped to lead a family. all others will fail. they will be liars, conartists, criminals, abusers, various kinds of freaks and sexually immoral people, drug addicts, alcoholics and everything in between. thats what godlessness looks like. thats all godlessness produces.

    people dont like to hear it, but, biblical truth is oftentimes very uncomfortable and inconvenient.

  • EMILY POST

    wth do you mean what do I have to say about a crazy man committing murder? Be careful who you have kids by?????

  • ReadingIsFundamental4Real

    I am sorry to hear you went through that.

  • http://batman-news.com Roderick2011

    He terrorized the entire family even his parents were afraid of him, and then he would live with women and they called the police on him for domestic violence.

    He's dead now so he can't hurt anyone else.

  • http://sandrarose.com SandraRose

    This is too much like right. They won't listen.