According to TMZ, a judge granted L.A. Lakers star Derek Fisher a restraining order in 2005 against a crazy white chick who calls herself “The REAL Mrs. Fisher.” Apparently this woman (who’s obviously a former jump off) is obsessed with Derek to the point where she follows him home and harasses his real wife and their kids.

Court papers document the love notes she sent him:

“If I give your sexy ass my new # r u going to call me or will u send the po po after me? Meanie.” And another: “Yes, I do want to have your babies – the ones you keep showing me. Our beautiful sons. Place them in my womb now.”

She also left notes for him on her Myspace page and her Twitter page. I don’t believe any of this because if it were true, Derek’s real wife (the woman walking behind him who looks like a linebacker) would have already stomped a mud hole in that woman’s derriere. Crazy or no crazy, you don’t mess with a black woman’s husband. In fact, very few married ballers take out restraining orders against their former side pieces. Because not only does wifey take care of the home front and the kids, she’s also The enforcer.

Remember that the wives of ballers had to battle other jump offs to win the top prize — and they have the battle scars to prove it. So if a stalker threatens her kids, she will kick off her heels, take off her earrings and go to work on that azz! There’s no need for a restraining order.

Which brings us back to Derek Fisher: what kind of punk goes running to a judge for a restraining order when he has a wife who could easily handle that — unless I’m reading her wrong? Doesn’t he know that TMZ has paid sources deep inside the courthouse and that his business would be spread all over the front page of the website like margarine?

Maybe Derek and his wife need to go see the film “Obsessed” starring Beyonce and Idris Elba to see how situations like this are handled in the real world.