The BET Hip Hop Awards 2013 takes place this weekend in Atlanta. The BET Awards are more than just a celebration of hip hop culture, it’s also a groupie convention. Wherever there is a large gathering of rappers, there will be groupies looking to take advantage of them.
Groupies and baby mama hopefuls will be flying in from all around the country to attend the festivities in the hopes of striking it rich and going home pregnant with a dumb rapper’s seed.
Thanks to loyal reader Zeralyn for sending in this video of tips and survival kits for young groupies, such as pre-poked condoms and rape kits complete with swabs just in case the evening doesn’t go as planned.
Watch the video after the break. Warning: Profanity and adult situational comedy.
A mess I wish they would find another ratchet city to house this non sense
You best believe them hoes have a list and be like check sluts
Lmao! The title, the picture, the caption. I cant see the vid, but this just made my day
Yo Kenya, is THIS why you’re going down to ATL this weekend??
ATL is ratchett, so
Smonae says:
Damn what happened to Three 6 show on MTV that sh*t was hilarious, I wonder what Shuga foot and Big Trice up too
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You remember when Shuga foot had him in that bed slapping him around
and she had that ranch dressing? Girl that show was so dam funny. I wish they’d bring it back..
I would hope that the wrappers would have their own condoms
#aintmyfault
BUT they are men, so they will probably rawdog it
<–Doesn't Talk To Strangers says:
Yo Kenya, is THIS why you’re going down to ATL this weekend??
ATL is ratchett, so
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“I’m a author bitch… I wrote a book…”
<–Doesn't Talk To Strangers says:
Yo Kenya, is THIS why you’re going down to ATL this weekend??
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Kenya WINNING
OutsidetheBox says:
What does that mean? *wiggles brows*
Late night romp?
Smonae says:
some trick gone actually take this to heart
I was thinking the same thing.
~~~~~~~~~~
I’m thinking about taking day off tomm. Sew tired.
Groupie Survival Kit
:giggles: No way. :hairtoss: We did text into the night. *deep sigh*
rape kits complete with swabs just in case the evening doesn’t go as planned.
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Didnt watch. Yall tell me how they managed to make this part funny?
Whewwwwww Sexting
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They (wrappers) should take this to heart
Whewwwwww Sexting
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Didjew know Americans consume 20 lbs of cheese a year
#+/-5lbs
#isawitintheelevator 
For you bytch 99.95….
That niggah make you mad…take dis to the hospital…rape kit…
just take me somewhere paaaleeeaze 
Is that… Bambi?
*self conciously rubs tongue across teeth* 
Most of these rappers broke mayne!
These hoes goin be like Shawty Lo sisiter wives trying to hawk a show!
OTB have you seen some of Emily B’s shoes for her shoe line I think the boots are cute
Does anyone watch Paternity Court
I love cheese. Provolone is my fave, followed by colby
FuturedocDonte says:
Does anyone watch Paternity Court
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no. But I did notice that Judge Judy comes on at nite now.. weird.
FuturedocDonte says:
Does anyone watch Paternity Court
**********
no. But I did notice that Judge Judy comes on at nite now.. weird.
“Hoe survival kit 99.95, but for u bytch, $19.95”.
OTB have you seen some of Emily B’s shoes for her shoe line I think the boots are cute
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not enough wake and bake for me to put up with bullchit today. Yeezus
lemme go find the bud man
hey Miss Harlem
^^^ +1 I ain’t watch it but the premise ain’t worth it imo
oh so Trinidad James is poking holes in condoms now, huh!
Didjew know Americans consume 20 lbs of cheese a year
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The Master Beta
says:
OTB have you seen some of Emily B’s shoes for her shoe line I think the boots are cute
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no but ill get right on that.
i think her style is cute. hood chic. judge if you must 
MIANY
hey girl. My stash game proper 
I just didnt have time so I only did a clip this morning le weep.
FuturedocDonte says:
Does anyone watch Paternity Court
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no. But I did notice that Judge Judy comes on at nite now.. weird.
—-
Judy always came on at 6pm in VA
Harleeeeeemmmmmmm
oh so Trinidad James is poking holes in condoms now, huh!
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FuturedocDonte says:
Does anyone watch Paternity Court
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no but i did see a show about Swingers.
it was interesting. kinda sad, but interesting. i know a girl who goes to swinger parties but being in a swinging marriage seems way too complicated.
Im currently stalking boots mainly fall boots and ESPECIALLY knee high boots. Who has suggestions?!!
Rumor has it that one of the Ying Yang twins gets his canned goods and non-perishables down at the mission where my Mama volunteers. I wonder if these kits are available online
Id luv to be a rap baby Mama. Id kill to be on L&HHATL 
Caramel Rain says:
I love cheese. Provolone is my fave, followed by colby
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pepper jack and bleu cheese
This paternity court show
there is a black man up here saying that this baby is his 
this baby is white as 
white as 
this baby is all the way white 
BRRRROOOOOOWWWWWNNNNN
Groupies and baby mama hopefuls will be flying in from all around the country to attend the festivities in the hopes of striking it rich and going home pregnant with a dumb rapper’s seed.
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Morning Roses :wave:
I wanna know why they going after rapper? I saw a show a while back that said if your album doesn’t reach a certain point, they really don’t have any money. Step yo’ game up hookers.
You remember when Shuga foot had him in that bed slapping him around and she had that ranch dressing?
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FuturedocDonte says:
This paternity court show there is a black man up here saying that this baby is his this baby is white as white as this baby is all the way white
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so he bliggidy black and the baby wiggidy white, huh?
hood chic.
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Do your thang girl. See.
Style is so subjective. I call my style hood chiC…saw a (homegrown) hood chicK in the hair store..exchanged pleasantries. 
Later BFF tells me hood chicK say she saw me in the hair store “dressed like a straight up white girl”
Bish.
#TeamStoneyJackson
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BREN
git
so I only did a clip this morning le weep.
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:weeps:
:crying1:
:joyinthePM:
WTH IS GOING ON
MissHarlem says:
Im currently stalking boots mainly fall boots and ESPECIALLY knee high boots. Who has suggestions?!!
on OTB to respond
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Just bought a navy blue jacket from Wilson’s…that damn 70% off sale
Ty, OTB, Shuga, Harlem, Donte
everyone 
Did anyone watch Black Inc Monday???
Why Dutchess look like a crackhead
Why Dutches playing a tough role, didnt a mixy or whatever they call dem girls beat the sleeves off her the 1st episode
Lawd #teamStoneyJackson
Hey Bren 
it can happen tho
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We got some in our family.
Did anyone watch Black Inc Monday???
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Yep Dutchess is bat shyt crazy
#TeamStoneyJackson says:
That damn gravi is priceless
jeniefrumdabloc says:
Ty, OTB, Shuga, Harlem, Donte everyone
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hey luv!
on OTB to respond
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I averted my eyes so quick.
I havent started boots yet; been avoiding all my sites and everything. 
Yall tell me what yall find. *drops another penny in “Fun jar*
Brownskin Cutie (Carrington’s E-boo) says:
I wanna know why they going after rapper? I saw a show a while back that said if your album doesn’t reach a certain point, they really don’t have any money. Step yo’ game up hookers.
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Chile some of the platinum selling artist are broke. These heffas see a nice watch and get a dopamine rush
A mess I wish they would find another ratchet city to house this non sense
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Co sign a thousand times.
these wrappers need a keep the coins intact kit.
1. Confidentiality Agreement and Consent Form
2. Dave Chappelle’s Love Contract
3. Photo I.D Card Scanner (to check for authenticity)
4. STD Kit
5. OWN pack of prophylactics
6. Female notary/witness to keep a visual refernece of events (she can join in the act as needed)
7. Mandatory Morning After Pill Contract (must be signed on camera)
Ceaser betta run, that hoe aint nothing but trouble, ha eyes be dancing and shyt<—– sho nuff sign of cray cray
JOYYYYY INNN THHEEE PM
NAE yes we did, she looks like a fake junkie, yes they did and she’s not tough
GTFOH you aint even from here have a fckn seat with your dusty dont know how to act bc you gettin some dick. CHILE PLEASE
*d!ick TUH
Brenden you can’t hide your font no matter how hard you try
Brownskin Cutie (Carrington’s E-boo) says:
I wanna know why they going after rapper? I saw a show a while back that said if your album doesn’t reach a certain point, they really don’t have any money. Step yo’ game up hookers
————–
Tricks betta fly to Vegas and audition for the Money Team
I swear yall make me soooooooooo sick
I dont know what to do to fool yall 
JENIE
I found some cute boots in Bloomingdales and Macys last night. Also saw some cute Vince Camuto fall dresses and yes even leather dresses. BUT Im still looking. I guess I will start the search. HEAVY SIGH
Did you have secks with Stoney Jackson’s gerry curl? @bizzle
4. STD Kit
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Is there really such a thing?
A mess I wish they would find another ratchet city to house this non sense
Hell our traffic is already a mess 
I wonder if the mayor is giving them a discount or something 
____________
@ Jenie hey hun
Jenay :wave:
BREN you cant contain being you. Give up boo we love you just the way you are
I just drank a coke and a kang sized snicker. Im never gone loose this 1′ belly roll
NBA Players
NFL Players
Drug kinpins (the local hustler)
Cops
Sanitation workers
RAPPERS
Kenya
<— me at the King and Queen of Harlem comment
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no they didnt!
Later BFF tells me hood chicK say she saw me in the hair store “dressed like a straight up white girl”
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ooh no she didnt! :blinked:
My son is getting his mama and sisters together for the fall/winter season.I got those sweaters I wanted from H&M and we all got Tims. Yeah buddy in my Pop’s voice.
Dutchess look like she smells of rotten cold cuts
that filthy mouth of hers chile…
and when she put the bra n pannie set on… I weeped for her 10 year old breasts. Negative A-cups
The trash folks in the A don’t make shyt down here
like they do up there in New Yawkkk!!
:giggles: No way. :hairtoss: We did text into the night. *deep sigh*
**********,*****
*looks at phone*
Tricks betta fly to Vegas and audition for the Money Team
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Nawl.
Them heaux need to stay right in the durty. Nerp. 
NBA Players
NFL Players
Drug kinpins (the local hustler)
Cops
Sanitation workers
RAPPERS
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Gigi
@ Bren u cant fool us, I can spot that back hair anywhere
*looks at gravi* 
Talking ’bout you
Yo, I took you out
But sex was on my mind for the whole damn route
My mind was in a frenzy and a horny state
But I couldn’t drop dimes cause you couldn’t relate
STD kit contains:
All the ointments
Condoms
more condoms
spermicides
dental dams
plastic wrap
and just in case there are holes punched in the condoms; a rabbit to piss on!
@Ty, put Baseball players at the top of that list.
Gigi26 says:
I can’t…Rappers are the bottom of the feeding chain son. it goes a lil somethin like this in order
NBA Players
NFL Players
Drug kinpins (the local hustler)
Cops
Sanitation workers
RAPPERS
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Gigi26 says:
I can’t…Rappers are the bottom of the feeding chain son. it goes a lil somethin like this in order
**MLB players
NBA Players
NFL Players
**Medical professionals with M.D. behind their name
Drug kinpins (the local hustler)
Cops
Sanitation workers
RAPPERS
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Fixed that for ya
Stoney Jackson used to be my boyfriend in my head! I loved me some him…had the Right On posters all over my room! That was in nineteen hundred and well you get the point.
Dutchess look like she smells of rotten cold cuts
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My Gawd Gigi!!!! I am over here dying!!!!
Did you have secks with Stoney Jackson’s gerry curl?
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GIgi
Plan B is OTC. Instead of sprinkling molly in dranks, they need to sprankle that Plan B in the morning after OJ.
That headline picture though
up top
MissHarlem says:
Now thattt, i was like these mofo's on them bath salts
Gigi26 says:
Dutchess look like she smells of rotten cold cuts that filthy mouth of hers chile…
and when she put the bra n pannie set on… I weeped for her 10 year old breasts. Negative A-cups
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Ahhh Jenie the hell you talkin bout son
Caramel Rain says:
4. STD Kit
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Is there really such a thing?
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ooh no she didnt! :blinked:
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I was like bish just cause I dont have a hunnid and sixty four ounces of weed (not weave..too classy) in my head.
Fuggin common whore.
SHUGA
they did. That was one of the reason for the king and queen chess piece tatt bc people say “yall the king and queen of Harlem” 
what crack she on
GYPSY actually I saw 2 sweaters I wanted from H&M. Its a crop vest type thing. Thanks for reminding me. Im gonna go grab that at lunch
GIGI them tits was sad wasnt they
*looks at phone*
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BOL!!!!
them nypd officers still qualify for foodstamps. you aint see the article?
Shiiid lemme get me a bus driver then…at least lemme get a metrocard out the deal 
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@Caramel: Chile that list is for the niggas that make it out the trap and Job Corp, not no straight n narrow dudes
Gigi26 says:
and when she put the bra n pannie set on… I weeped for her 10 year old breasts. Negative A-cups
————-
H&M
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And the Isabale Marant stuff.
About to get all my coins. Imma have to stay home from work to shop properly.
I LOVE H&M. So mannie, mannie nice things for good prices.
jeniefrumdabloc says:
The trash folks in the A don’t make shyt down here like they do up there in New Yawkkk!!
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work early, get off early and make like 75k easy too.
used to date this garbage man for a hot minute. i stopped speaking to him bc his daughter had the same name as me & i thought sex would be awkward.
So rabbits don’t come in the kits?
NAE bath salts!! Thats it!!! EUREKA
DIVA Right On! was the mag. Only 3 mo months till DALLLLLAAAAASSSSS :2dance:
Harlem: She ain’t even have tits…them joints were just nipples…or the imprint of a chest
Gigi said the job corp.
wtf be wrong with her? just type any ol thing
used to date this garbage man for a hot minute. i stopped speaking to him bc his daughter had the same name as me & i thought sex would be awkward.
Man I had this Italian MTA worker sweating me…used to wait right by the bus depot…shiiid I should’ve let him get a taste..coulda had me some unlimited joints to sell on the side 
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GIGI
how bout that yellow getup she modeled in made me notice said “nips” Bless her lordt
gypsyeyes says:
So rabbits don’t come in the kits?
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i aint about this life….or life in general cuz im gone!
Can we talk about STD kits?
Have you guys done an Oraquick??
Well not really a a STD kit. THEE STD (Oraquick) kit. My homeboy was telling me his lady brought two. He has been asking to go without rubbers. Theyve been together about two yrs? No kids.
So
they get the tests and take them or whatever. He was like I know Im clean its just a nervous process to go thru. 
SO they waiting the twenty minutes and he fukks around and knocks his off the table it was on. (You leave a vial upright with liquid while the test processes)
Why she was like
Put her clothes on and went home. BOL!!!!
its an at home test kit, but for the wrapper with an abundance of coins. They can rent the next room out for a mobile quest diagnostics lab.
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gypsyeyes says:
So rabbits don’t come in the kits?
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Im gonna go grab that at lunch
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:eyeroll: Thinks about the nearest H&M to me. :eyeroll: #jelly
i spit out my broccoli and stuffin fuggin witchu OTB and tht dam Oraquick story!
heavens to murgatroid, yo!!!
i stopped speaking to him bc his daughter had the same name as me & i thought sex would be awkward.
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LMAOOOOO. Is that how you “dump” ppl. Just be like Take Care.
Without actually using the words? Me too. 
wtf be wrong with her? just type any ol thing
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MissHarlem says:
NAE bath salts!! Thats it!!! EUREKA
DIVA Right On! was the mag. Only 3 mo months till DALLLLLAAAAASSSSS :2dance:
———————–
Yes it was! Chile I am ready for those Ewings!!!!!! Can’t wait
heavens to murgatroid, yo!!!
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He only told me cause he was mad!! He
me like, “yo whas so and so numma?”
Why?
<–me..
And thats when he told me he aint got time for her chit and blah blah blah. I was like bruh
dont you think thats why she want you to take the test in the first place?
:silence: <–him..then "mayne fukk all that"
OTB aint nada wrong with that. I want to know bc my ass likes to go there with not much boundaries so Im gonna need for you to take this Oraquick. Im thinking bout getting one bc my gyn is tired of seein me. I dont care what he thinks bc he is right down the block and it gets me away from work. So what I aint active
Looking at these Tumblr photos. Me and Bey lasted the same amount of time with short hair.
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When the New York Post recently reported with some disgust that the highest paid janitors in New York City each make more than $140,000, it caught my attention. Typical Post-y puns decried how custodians were “mopping up” and “cleaning us out.” And Harold Levy, a former schools chancellor, was quoted as saying, “The idea that custodians make more than teachers is outrageous.” Yoav Gonen, the reporter who wrote the piece, added not-so-subtle condescension for the profession by putting the official term for the job—custodial engineer—in quotation marks. The story also noted how one top-earning public school’s custodian abused taxpayer dollars by having his subordinates paint his house on the job—if true, an appalling fact that should cost him his job. But most of the writer’s rage was directed at the fact that a few janitors were making a decent living at all.
OutsidetheBox says:
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@Caramel: Chile that list is for the niggas that make it out the trap and Job Corp, not no straight n narrow dudes
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Ty:
we have hella parades and other events here that allow for sanitation workers to get an insane amount of overtime. most parades are on the weekends or holidays—thats double time right there.
teachers dont have that luxury, plus they get the whole summer off so all they get is whatever their regular salary is.