The disappearance of 4-year-old Maleah Davis of Houston, Texas, has created a movement to encourage mothers to stop leaving their children alone with their boyfriends.
Police say Derion Vence was the last person to see Maleah alive. Vence was engaged to Maleah’s mother, Brittany Bowens. He told police three Hispanic males carjacked him, knocked him out and took Maleah on May 3.
Maleah was last seen alive on April 30 on a neighbor’s security camera, following Vence into the family’s apartment. Bowens was inside the apartment at the time, but she told police she did not know her daughter was in the apartment.
“He must have snuck her in,” Bowens told a friend via text message.
Vence, 26, was arrested and charged with tampering with a human corpse after Maleah’s blood and human tissue were found in various places throughout the apartment.
Six Brown Chicks wrote a post detailing why women should never leave their children unattended with males who are not their biological fathers.
They quote child experts who say men are not nurturers or caretakers by nature. They don’t have the proper temperament or the patience to deal with small children who are not their own.
“YOUR BOYFRIEND IS NOT YOUR BABYSITTER. Watch your own child, beloved,” they wrote.
The following are 5 reasons why you should not leave your children with your boyfriends.
1. The man he is with you may not be the man he is with your child.
“Anecdotally, providers and people in the child welfare system are certainly aware of the increased risk of mothers’ boyfriends [to children], especially those who come late on the scene,” clinical psychologist Jennifer Shaw, who works as a partner of the Gil Institute for Trauma and Recovery, tells Vice. “Boyfriends are not necessarily involved in the infancy phase, where a lot of the attachment and bonding with the child takes place.”
2. Some men envy the attention that you give your child and may secretly compete with him.
Notes Dr. Kurt Smith, Clinical Director of Guy Stuff Counseling & Coaching, “Men in particular are susceptible to feelings of jealousy, especially during the infant and toddler years. Your man, who may have been the picture of a doting father-to-be, now finds himself an outsider and onlooker to a very unique bond. A bond with which he feels he cannot participate or compete.”
3. Some men resent the child because that kid looks like your ex.
Self explanatory.
4. Some men want to relax at home and a screaming, non-potty-trained toddler is enough to make him snap.
Self explanatory.
5. Some men don’t love themselves enough to love their own child—let alone yours.
Self explanatory.