Who Knew Rihanna and Melissa Were Lovers?

According to celebrity blogger Necole Bitchie, Rihanna and her so-called assistant, Melissa, “kissed and made up” after falling out recently.

NB knows more about these things than I do since she came out of the closet and is more into “the life” than I am.

Anyway, how did RiRi and Melissa’s relationship get past me? This is the same Melissa whose name is tattooed all over Rihanna’s body. That fact alone would usually serve as a clue to most, but somehow I missed it.

I’m usually the first to notice a chick with lesbionic tendencies, and while Rihanna gives off lesbionic vibes all day long, I just never got that from her assistant Melissa.

Now everything kind of makes sense. For instance, that explains why Rihanna suddenly dumped Chris Brown (Melissa probably told her: “him or me bitch”) or why RiRi is covering for the gay rapper Drake as his beard (probably as a favor to that other gay rapper, Jay Z).

See what you learn when you read the blogs?