Singer Jill Scott has 2 failed marriages and a slew of failed relationships under her girdle. So it is no surprise that, at age 42, she has given up on marriage or any semblance of a longterm relationship with men.
In an interview with ABC News Radio to promote her new film, With This Ring, Scott explains why she only dates men for 6 months before dumping them and moving on to the next.
Scott said making With This Ring was a painful reminder of her own failed relationships.
"I'm older now so I see a little bit better than I did before. My longest relationships now are about nine months. Actually, now it's grown to six months. There's no need for me to waste my time or anybody else's. I know by then. If you make it over the six month hump, you have done something. I must really like you."
What Ms. Scott doesn't realize is that she is describing the Dopamine phase.
As my loyal readers know, the Dopamine phase is that stage of intense sexual attraction that normally results in procreation.
The brain chemicals responsible for the Dopamine phase reminds us that we are intensely attracted, or we feel a certain "chemistry" toward someone.
But the "chemistry" phase does not last. This is the point when immature adults who were only in the relationship for the thrill or the excitement tend to move on, as Jill Scott is doing.
These brief but intensely exciting relationships are often referred to as "Dopamine relationships".
Ms. SCott also touched on young people's unhealthy obsession with holding their stomachs in, so they appear more attractive to their partners who prefer flat, washboard stomachs.
"You can hold your stomach in for four hours, but you can't hold it in forever. You have to be who you are and you have to genuinely love who you love in order to have a lasting marriage. Getting married is one thing; staying married is something else."
What the Film Taught Cast of With This Ring:
"The movie made us all think about what we're doing. You know, what are we doing? For the married girls, it made them question and decide for certain that they made the right decision on who they married. They thought about it -- not to say they hadn't before -- but we talked about that: why they chose to marry these guys. And for Regina and I, the two single girls, we really thought about what it is that we want."
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