I spotted this on Perezhilton.com who posted the song in honor of Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon’s alleged nuptials.
The song is a remix of Mariah Carey’s hit “Touch My Body” called “Retouch My Body” and it is hee-larious! I actually like this version better than the original because Jackie is spittin’ the truth about these image obsessed celebrities.
Check out the lyrics:
- If there’s a camera up in here that’s takin’ photographs of me
Then it’s true, that you
Must sign this confidentiality agreement right here
tellin’ you, what to do
‘Cause if you run the pics you got without the use of PhotoShop
I will hunt you down
‘Cause baby this is show business, nobody wants the truth
Don’t even try it, this is my diet
Retouch my body
Stretch me some more
Take off sixty pounds
Then take off ten more
Retouch my body
Re-size my head
Clean up my skin
Please tone down the red
Retouch my body
Lipo my thighs
With your computer mouse
I’m as big as a house
Retouch my body
Remove every curve
I’m goin’ to the mall to get a soft serve
LISTEN:
Retouch My Body by Jackie Beat